Well. my friends it has been a while. The comparatively sober live continues. I don't have to go, look or smell very far to figure that I am actually doing pretty good, I guess. I say I guess cuz, though I work and save a bit of money, I still am up at 6 every day and get home at 4 or so. The crank welchers sit home all day, get all there stuff paid for and what they don't they steal or hang out at the Albertson,s bummin money. They get up at the crack of whenever and stay up till whenever. Can't tell if I got it good or not. I think I will and do have more of my mind left then they do. I know this is no ones fault and blame no one. Am really ok. Some shit just pisses me off.
Well I used to own a house, had a wife and a cat. Really liked that cat. I had told her I was wanting out. She was growing away from me and, I think, society in general. I tried and tried. She had a job she hated and she wouldn't quit it. I made enough money to pay for everything and she could have quit and found another job. This being back when there were jobs. We had also bought the house before the insane explosion in housing prices. You know, before the price meant the monthly payment was below what the average person could afford. We made good mons on it when sold. I kinda blew it all though.
I hooked up with a gal with two girls and she was hurting, thought I could help, but she had refinanced herself down the toilet. She ended up selling her house 3 years ago--pre-crash--guy who bought it is still probably a hundred grand under water. So, freaking real up and down thing with her. The sex was awesome and often, though. She loved me hard. So I blew my mons on her and ended up here. Kinda freeing to put this down. Still got to think three years ago was with her in her house, big old house and pretty nice. Two little girls that loved me and her sitting on my face to wake me up more often then not. I feel like I am a smart guy but will never understand why I was never satisfied with my situation. Almost like I have to live in a ditch, some kinda psychological twitch, I guess.
Nother thing I don't understand is pity, especially in this money loving society. Look you got money, here is a trip for ya---no one gives a shit! For the most part people are or try to stay so busy they don't even have time to think about what you do or don't have and they are freakin fine with their lot! Life is pretty good and it comes from the inside. How many upper middle class dickheads I know who are so frustrated because no matter how much they make or spend and, oh shit, they aren't really any happier then some dude on the street. Maybe worshiping the golden cow money God aint where it is at????
Wow I ranted, sure it is because I am so frustrated with everything that is my own fault! No funny I have a calmness, ease with life. Specially when I am drunk! No, kidding again. Maybe I just don't drink enough 3-4 times a month aint much after all. Anyway I am stuck here metal houses that don't cover the noise of the highway. Everyone of them has something broken, a gutter, some plumbing, brought here 20-30 years ago and they are going no where, least not in one piece.
I will stronger.
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